Hi Dmitry,
Peering is a meeting of equals. Any time there's an asymmetry in investment in networks, the party with a more valuable network will demand a premium for high-performance access to their network.
When I worked at a startup ISP in 1995 (first year of commercial Internet access), the big players would not peer with us (Internet Direct) until we purchased our own national backbone. At that point the bar was DS3 (45 mbps) to at least Reston VA, Chicago, and San Jose. They were happy to sell us transit until we got that big. (which didn't happen)
Nothing has changed and New Zealand is no different from anywhere else, except for having a country with a lower population density and more difficult/expensive network operations conditions that most.
If you want a more detailed explanation I've written a case study including financial models (click the triangles to expand them) of why two island carriers in the Pacific might not peer on-island. That's here:��
https://beta.pacpeer.org/avaiki As it is on a beta site I'd be happy for feedback from any reader.
Cheers,
Jon